The Titular Total Tool, At Your Fingertips, To Solidly Sympathize With Suffering Snowflakes …
In recent months you may have heard or seen some new words pop up in your social media news feed. Well, maybe not exactly new words “per se” but, old words with new definitions. I have compiled a list of these words for your convenience, entitled “The Snowflake Dictionary.” Now you can remain up to date on today’s “newspeak.” Can you say “1984?”
The “Snowflake” Dictionary
Criminal: (krim-uh-nl) 1. A politician of opposing view.
Deplorable: (dih-plawr-uh-buh l) 1. A supporter of the Republican party or President Donald J. Trump 2. A patriot.
Fascist: (fa-shist) 1. Someone who believes in conservative values.
2. Someone capable of forming a cogent argument, providing actual facts or statistics, and able to disagree with the parroted lies spread by the snowflake community.
Gender: (jen-der) 1. A social construct created by the patriarchy in order to oppress others.
2. A made up binary classification designed to demoralize and victimize individuals who are otherwise subjectively identified.
Islamophobe: (iz-laham-oh-fhob) 1. One who persecutes, hates, or is fearful of the religion of peace, Islam.
2. Those who are opposed to Sharia law in the United States.
3. Those who oppose Islamic Terror organizations. (see also: Racist)
Mansplaning: (man-spleyn-ing) 1. A period of time during which an individual, typically a male, attempts to express factual information that the listener believes to be fake.
Microaggression: (mahy-kroh-uh-gresh-uhn) 1. An innocent word or phrase, usually taken out of context, causing a snowflake to become upset or irrational. (see also: Triggered)
Misogynist: (mi-soj-uh-nist) 1. An individual who agrees with traditional gender roles.
Racist: (race-ist) 1. Any person who holds high the idea of security for his or her nation and its borders.
2. Someone who believes that one must earn respect based upon their achievements as opposed to the color of their skin.
Safety Pin: (sefy-tee pin) 1. A device typically used as a temporary closure, now worn on one’s clothing as a means of identifying themselves as needing a “safe space.”
Safe Space: (sefy speys) 1. An area in which one is safe from a perceived threat, usually in the form of accurate facts and statistics.
2. An area of retreat from society due to perceived persecution or misconduct. (see also: Safety Pin)
Suffrage: (suhf-rij) 1. A term loosely applied to describe the perceived plight of women, trans-sexuals, homosexuals, or others who the left believes to be threatened by conservative values.
Triggered: (trig-erd) 1. A temporary state in which one becomes overly sensitive and, in some cases, aggressive, due to a perceived offensive statement, typically referred to as a “microaggression.”
2. A mental disorder.
Tyrant: (tahy-ruhnt) 1. A political leader, agency, or organization, who enforces the law, statutes, and policies of a district or nation. (see also: Donald J. Trump)
White Privilege: (wahyt priv-lij) 1. A series of perceived benefits afforded to those with white skin, usually parroted by those with white skin.
Xenophobe: (zen-uh-fohb) 1. Anyone who disagrees with the agenda agreed upon by the left with regard to immigration, refugees, and open borders. (see also: Racist or Islamophobe)
Of course this is not an exhaustive list of words that the Snowflake community has changed the meaning of in order to further their agenda. Look for “The Snowflake Dictionary, Vol. II,” coming soon!